Tuesday, December 11, 2012

"Twilight" Review


I was a hater for a long time. Then I saw Breaking Dawn Part I and it changed me, probably for the worse, but it changed me nonetheless. My thirst for camp and unintentional comedy was quenched and my awe of cultural phenomenon was thoroughly stimulated. I was even infatuated with Kristen Stewart's terrible furrowed-brow-form of acting. It's just so bad, but a very entertaining guilty cinematic pleasure.

Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part II
Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Directed by Bill Condon
My Opinon: Not bad
Unfortunately,  Part II is no where near as ridiculous as Part I, and is definitely not as fun. However, it has so many moments of heightened stupidity that I was absorbed for the whole ride. The awkward sex scene, the inconsistent sizes of the wolves, and the battle scene. One of my favorite comedic moments of 2012 is when Bella Swan is experiencing her first moments as a vampire. Her hungry face looks like she's desperately trying to expel a turd that's 10 inches in diameter. Overall, I was happy and will watch it again. Not a bad finale.

"Flight"



If you have trouble flying already, be weary about experiencing this dramatic thriller. Whip Whittaker (Denzel Washington) is an alcoholic, risk-taking airline pilot. At the beginning of the film, it seems like he's living the large life. The film opens with him in bed next to an insanely attractive and naked flight attendant, both of whom are still intoxicated from the festivities of the previous night. He gets a phone call from his ex-wife, snorts some coke and goes to work. His attitude hints that this is a typical day - but it won't turn out that way.

Fight
Starring: Denzel Washington, Don Cheadle, John Goodman
Directed by Robert Zemeckis
My Opinon: Highly entertaining,
way better that "Unstoppable," but
not the best picture of the year.
As the time for take-off nears, the rain comes down in sheets. Despite the ominous weather, the crew gets ready for take-off. The co-pilot notices that Whip is acting strangely, but keeps his mouth tightly shut as they prepare for take-off. Soon after they are airborne, another omen occurs. Abounding turbulence terrifies the passengers as Whip hugs a dangerous air pocket, yet he brings the plane back to a smooth glide. Everything seems fine for a while, but trouble soon resurges. A defect on the airplane sends the plane into a dive. With miraculous dare-devil tactics, Whip lands the plane in an empty field, saving nearly everyone on board.

That scene is enough to keep you from blinking. Everyone around me had their mouth open and their eyes wide. It's easy to imagine yourself in the plane, though absolutely terrifying. The rest of the film follows the aftermath: an investigation and the emotional turmoil that torments Whip. There is a budding romance with a recovering addict whom Whip meets in the hospital that is intriguing but feels a little obvious and artificial. A random appearance of a cancer patient who "knows all the answers cause he's dying," which even the script seems to find a little corny and out of tone. Denzel nails his performance, but don't get your panties wet: he's looking pretty puffy here, and for good reason. I mean, his character is an alcoholic. If he had a damn fine body, it wouldn't make sense. Moving on, the script works and the direction is very smooth. It's a solid watch that has some very juicy moments.

I'm going to tell myself that the events that happened on this flight are extremely rare, because otherwise I can't get on a plane. This is not a true story, just drama, thrills and some damn fine performances. Oscar-worthy? That award hardly means anything, but I don't think it's the best picture of the year. The entertainment value is worthy of three eyeballs certainly. However, it has it's sappy predictability and an excessive nature. I would certainly say that it is Oscar-bait, but it doesn't quite hit the mark for best picture. It's a hell of a ride though.