Horrible Horrors: 'Warm Bodies' and 'Mama'

I recently RedBoxed two horror movies that I was anxious to see: The zombie rom-com Warm Bodies and Mama, starring Jessica Chastain. While the opening scenes had me hooked, as the films progressed my eyes were left dazzled but somehow also bored. My expectations weren't very high for either: all I wanted was a few satisfying thrills and a fix for my blood craving. Neither film delivered.

Warm Bodies
Starring: Nicholas Hoult, Teresa Palmer, Analeigh Tipton
Directed by Jonathan Levine
My Opinion: Lame

 It seems as though the horror genre is succumbing to an array of special effects with only a blurry shadow of a story. Underdeveloped scripts are tossed into the hands of directors and producers with dollar signs for eyes and ka-ching sounds for heartbeats. That may be a little harsh, but just look at the paralyzed plot in Warm Bodies. The film opens with a brutal, stomach-turning attack on a Franco brother which was awesome. But soon, the inconsistencies are aplenty and the characters are driving an inexplicably functional abandoned car to nowhere. To be fair, I shut the film off early due to lack of patience, but it was dragging more than the zombies' feet.

I'm not sure why, but Mama kept me from throwing in the towel. Despite my boyfriends groaning protests, I was desperately hopeful for a comeback. Soon, the plot thins to water and the only thing that scared me was the thought that Mama would never end. Then the ending happened. I just don't understand how anything so stupid could drag on for so long. Surely the director is a sadist.

Mama
Starring: Jessica Chastain, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau,
Megan Charpentier
Directed by Andres Muschietti
My Opinion: Not worth the $1.20 on RedBox.

I hope the next batch of horror flicks proves me wrong, but it seems as the genre is just as processed and tasteless as American cheese. With the charming wit of Cabin in the Woods and the playful thrills of Evil Dead, you'd think I'm overreacting, but those are exceptions - few and far between. Time will only tell what the future holds for the genre - especially with the upcoming premiere of the Carrie remake, due out October of this year. I don't know about you, but the edge of my seat is absent.

"Silver Linings Playbook" Review

Pat Solitano, a divorcee desperate to get his wife back, moves back in with his overprotective parents. Pat's life becomes more complicated when he meets Tiffany, a mysterious widow searching for closure on her own.

Silver Linings Playbook
Starring: Bradley Cooper, Jennifer Lawrence, Robert Deniro
Directed by David O. Russell
My Opinion: Overrated

As I check off the last of these must-see Best Picture nominees, I'm feeling continuously more disappointed. Silver Linings is little more than a frame for Jennifer Lawrence's performance. While she does a fantastic job, the film itself falls flat. It's as if the writers could not decide on the central conflict resulting in a collage of chaotic scenes filled with yelling. Furthermore, I somehow felt as if every line of dialogue was anticipated - as if I was reading a script still under the editor's eye.

The movie is fine - just another romantic comedy with a couple explosive moments of acting, but it's nothing special. The more Oscar films I watch the less I care about film.

"Les Miserables" Review

Set against the backdrop of 19th century France, Les Miserables is a desperate tale of the human condition under immense amounts of suffering and despair. It is a beautifully shot film with blue hues and impeccable performances.

Les Misérables
Starring Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, Anne Hathaway
Directed by Tom HooperMy Opinion: Long but not miserable

Most of the performances are fantastic. The always-handsome Hugh Jackman's depiction of Jean Valjean is passionate one: a man weathered by a life of despair yet still hopeful to amend his life. Of course, Anne Hathaway's brief but memorable portrayal of Fontine, a fallen woman desperate enough to sell her own teeth for her child, was disturbing and entirely magnetic. I can't help but ask, however, why were there teeth still in her mouth after she sold her own? I don't think they had dentures then. Perhaps the producers decided that a toothless, bald and malnourished Anne Hathaway would be too grotesque for the public's eye. But the film is quick to obtain a raw grim presence, why stop short?
The feats established by Hathaway and Jackman, while remarkable, overshadow Russell Crowe's performance as the obsessive officer Javert. However, I was still impressed by Crowe: his role is an award-worthy display of terrible casting. Never in my life have I been so anxious for a suicide.
Performances aside, the adaption of Hugo's novel left me teary-eyed but confused about the happenings in the story. The film was so quick to display the performances, it seemed to rush the back story, making the film feel very long upfront. Towards the mid-point, the pieces begin to fall into place; however, the strong political climate is missing. Though the characters are all suffering from the cruel reality of 19th century France, there is very little description of the historical circumstances. I don't need a history lesson, but something that illustrates the political situation beyond a catchy lyric sung by hopeful young men and a single quick shootout would be beneficial.

Though Les Mis has one of the most lovely scores in musical history, I can't see anyone rushing to purchase the soundtrack for Hooper's film. The live singing was impressive and made for a particularly befitting realism, but it wasn't always beautiful. I'm not a musical fanatic and I found the musical style interesting but rather draining.
All in all, Les Mis is a beautiful but endless tale of human suffering. Though I'm glad I watched it, I don't think that I could have gone for the full ride in a theater. However. it's not a bad Red Box pick.

"End of Watch" Review

When Brian Taylor (Jake Gyllenhaal) decides to start filming his daily experiences as a member of the LAPD, he had no idea what he would capture. Brian and his partner/friend, Mike Zavala (Michael Peña), fall in far over there heads when their paths cross with a drug cartel.

End of Watch
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Michael Peña, Anna Kendrick
Directed by David Ayer
Available on RedBox
My Opinion: Worth the ride.

I'm not sure why, but Bro-mances seem to make the sweetest movies. Even the rambunctiously obscene Ted has it's aw-inducing moments (my review here). Though End of Watch has a raw, hand-held approach to the buddy cop genre, the tear jerking moments are still aplenty. Anna Kendrick's always adorable presence as Taylor's interest of love doesn't exactly dampen the mood either.

As someone who has experienced motion sickness, I'm not a huge fan of the shaky cam, but End of Watch almost makes it work. There is always at least one character filming the action, however, there are also several angles and shots still shaky but without an agent to account for the style. It's not a big deal, but it is noticeable. Also, I did find myself chuckling during a few very ridiculous moments and I'm sure my reaction was not that which was intended. Overall though, End of Watch is gritty and entertaining ride throughout.

"Stoker" Review

Stocker follows India Stoker (Mia Wasikowska), an estranged high school senior who loses her father and best friend to a freak car accident on her 18th birthday. Evelyn (Nicole Kidman), India's distant and emotionally unstable mother, welcomes the support of Charles, her late husband’s distant brother -- whose existence is unfamiliar to India until he mysteriously appears at the wake wearing a light-colored suit -- into their home. As the haunting details about Charles surface, India's infatuation with him blossoms. 

Stoker
Starring: Mia Wasikowska, Nicole Kidman, Matthew Goode
Directed by Chan-Wook Park
My Opinion: Fuck Yeah

Chan-Wook Park's new horror is reminiscent of his past films, including Old Boy, Thirst, and Three Extremes, but it certainly leaps into a league of its own. Though Stoker was quickly criticized for having a "weak" script in comparison to Park's earlier work, this is not an opinion that I share. I am always looking for a high-quality script, but here Park chooses a visual method of storytelling. There are a few scenes that have hardly any dialogue at all, yet the vibrant, stylized cinematography controls the narrative, illustrating the portentous development of a troubled young adult. Park's scrupulous attention to detail fetishizes both incest and the cold heart of a killer, which makes the film all the more alluring and simultaneously creepy (for some). Park's work is utterly sopping in symbolism and I look forward to deciphering further upon my second viewing.

Aside from the dazzling film work, the performances are equally shiver-inducing. Kidman does an incredible job as a widower, desperate for love and affection. Kidman's execution alongside Wasikowska painted a dark but exposed portrayal of a pained mother-daughter relationship. On her own, Wasikowska artfully represents a dangerous young girl in a performance that very much reminded me of Catherine Deneuve in Roman Polanski's Repulsion.

A horror film that is artful and thoroughly meditated, Stoker crawls beneath your skin and leaves a lasting and beautiful impression. Bravo.

"Evil Dead" Review

Five teenagers travel to a cabin deep in the woods for a weekend getaway where they accidentally awaken the evil dead.

Evil Dead
Starring Jane Levy, Shiloh Fernandez, Lou Taylor Pucci
Directed by Fede Alvarez
My Opinion: This is some quality entertainment,
if you don't take it too seriously.

This update of Sam Raimi's beloved classic is surprisingly solid. Naturally, it doesn't quite reach the grotesquely lovable original, but it stands tall amidst recent, less successful remakes (Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Nightmare on Elmstreet). The film modifies but maintains several key moments for Raimi-fanatics (tree raping, anyone?). It also creates a back story behind the cabin and some of the visitors, but an explanation is pretty insignificant for a film with such a degree of ridiculousness.

Overall, Evil Dead is a pretty good modern horror flick: it has laughs and scares without dawdling in between. Don't take it too seriously and pair with a full theater and some alcohol - a brew and view would be ideal!

Review of "Argo"

Argo concerns a group of US diplomats who are trying to escape Iran and the hothead who rescues them.

Argo
Starring Ben Affleck, John Goodman, Bryan Cranston
Directed by Ben Affleck
My Opinion: Tastes like Lean Cuisine.

I've had no respect for the Oscars for some time, so I wasn't all that surprised when Argo was a generic popcorn movie. The film isn't bad, it's just very slow and boring. Had there been a little more action, a little more wit and a lot less waiting, I would have been more satisfied. However, like that of the other Best Picture nominations of 2013, the pacing is extremely slow. Argo lacks the artfulness of Lincoln and the thrills and controversy of Zero Dark Thirty. Perhaps staring at Affleck's dowdy face and pube beard threw me off, but I did not enjoy his movie. It's just kind of lame.