"The Cabin in the Woods" Review

It's new, it's great. If you love horror, it's a must see.

The Cabin in the Woods
Starring: Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth and Anna Hutchison
Directed by Drew Goddard
My Opinion: Watch it now.

I WILL NOT RISK SPOILING THIS!

Review of "God Bless America"

The superficiality of modern society has become too much for middle aged Frank. When he discovers that he is terminally ill due to a tumor in his brain, he decides to take out his frustrations on the rude, inconsiderate and worthless people around him, with the help of his accomplice: a quirky, teenaged loner named Roxy.

God Bless America
Starring: Joel Murray, Tara Lynne Barr
Directed by Bobcat Goldthwait
My Opinion: A fun, but fanciful ride

This movie is not unlike a comedic, action- driven version of Saw with grindhouse-y undertones. However, instead of immoral acts feeding the Jigsaw in this metaphor, it's reality television. The movie presents spoofs of much-loved reality classics such as My Super Sweet Sixteen, Bad Girls Club and American Idol. The events in the fake shows are incredibly accurate. For example, on Tuff Gurls a girl plucks a tampon out of her vagina and throws the bloody cotton in the face of her housemate. I will admit that I really wish this happened on the actual Bad Girls Club, but the film makes a pungent point with this wildly entertaining moment: a television show on a network that claims itself as "for women" is doing a whole lot of damage to the feminist movement. This is what drives Frank crazy.
The story is framed by the season of American Superstars, the alias for Idol. When we are first introduced to Frank, he is in an insomniac state partly brought on by his incredibly immature and inconsiderate neighbors. He habitually alleviates the sleeplessness with television where he watches the auditions for Superstarz, which, like its real-life counterpart, resembles a freak show. Rather than William Hung, Steven Clark is the grossly incompetent singer who becomes both ridiculed and glamorized. Steven occasionally haunts the screen, reminding us of the driving force behind the terror Frank wreaks.
God Bless America holds a lot of water in its criticisms of our nation. We are superficial and filled with mind-numbing pop culture talks about LiLo and TomKat, but Frank's interpretation of the world is what's killing him. The film does a decent job of connoting that as well, especially in regards to his broken family and disjointed life in Syracuse. However, the film lacks some solidity in its story. What turns Frank from suicidal to homicidal is merely a redundancy. Furthermore, the film sheds only a dim light on what drives his partner in crime, Roxy. Other than the fact that she feels like an outsider, we don't know what makes this young girl hate the world so much. She's incredibly intelligent, very opinionated and a wonderful character, but she comes close to the cookie-cutter angsty teen that is so lovable in comedies of today.
My final criticism is the believability. Normally, I don't consider this, but for a film that maintains such stark criticism and wit, I think it matters that the law enforcement was all but absent. Roxy and Frank kill four different people in a movie theater, and they walk out easily. Their faces are on the news, yet there is never a chase. The media would be an even better antagonist had it provided more conflict for the heroines of the tale. Had it been an entire character, one that was pursuing the protagonists' demise, the stakes would have been higher and any of the dragging present in the film, no matter how slight, would have vanished. The film donated its final moment to a respectful homage to the classic Bonnie and Clyde, but it would have worked better modeling its plot after the film also.
Over all, this is a pretty good film. It's hilarious and highly entertaining with golden dialogue and a fun premise. Yet, in the end, it's another black comedy that just doesn't aspire to greatness. Whatever, I liked it.

Review of "A Separation"

If you're looking to watch a movie that will provide an enigmatic glimpse into another culture all while utterly deflating any happiness that you were feeling, stop by your local RedBox today and pick up A Separation. This academy award winning film is rich, fulfilling and completely melancholic.

A Separation
Starring: Peyman Moadi, Leila Hatami, Sareh Bayat
Directed by Asghar Farhadi
My Opinion: Absolutely excellant. 

The story focuses entirely on the religion-fueled culture of Iran. The actual plot is very simple: A woman leaves her family out of her own best interest and her husband must find day help to care for his father, who is in a very late stage of alzheimer's disease. The woman he hires is pregnant and working without the knowledge or consent of her husband. Eventually, a dispute between employer and employee grows heated and the man tosses the woman from his home. Her unborn child is later found dead. As the movie runs on, details surface that change everything. There is no clear cut answer in this situation, but the cause of the conflict continually boils back down to the separation.
I got the feeling that this movie was for those outside of the culture. It seemed that an Iranian would see this film with some disinterest, as it was centered around how religion intersects with the judicial system. However, the cyclone of emotion and morality in the story was harrowing. True human turmoil is depicted in this film with some of the most honest acting I've ever seen. The children in the film deserve a special mention for making their eyes look so pitiful and evoking so much with what few years they had. The cinematography was grim but exhaustingly beautiful. The direction was perfect, so much so that I have very little to say about it. I felt as if I had been drawn into the situation, as if I had to testify in court. If you have the attention span for 123 minutes of subtitles, I'd say this is a must-see.

Review of "The Dictator"

When I found out that Sacha Baron Cohen was no longer making his disarmingly improvisational films, I was moderately disappointed. The vulgarity and shock value of his previous endeavors were entertaining, both in the actually humor contained in the films and the controversy they stirred up. So, yes, his newest addition to his collage of characters couldn't have been more than a relative letdown. In fact, I found it astonishingly tame and very mediocre.

The Dictator
Starring: Sacha Baron Cohen, Anna Faris, Alec Berg
Directed by Larry Charles
My Opinion: You'll get some laughs out, but that's about it.

The plot line was promising: Aladeen, the goofy dictator of the Republic of Wadiya, comes to America to ensure that Democracy doesn't spread to his oppressed nation. His body double is mistaken for himself, and Aladeen is forced to make it in the big apple. He gets a job at an organic food market that employs refugees and even gets a lesbian to fall in love with him.
The culture clash lent itself to plentiful humor, most of which was predictable but still worth it. The rest of the laughs stem from Aladeen's eccentricity and utter boldness: shooting competitors to win a race and changing words in the dictionary to his name. However, as the film wore on I found myself losing sight of Aladeen's character. I felt that the vegan culture he had surrounded himself with had tamed too quickly. It didn't seem that Aladeen was strong enough to withstand the demands of a structured plot and he fell flat, into a predictable, sympathetic human. This was fine for the plot and perhaps necessary, but I have to admit it was kind of .
Had it been an unscripted film, the impact would have been heavier and the laughs riskier, but more pungent. Naturally, the plentiful famous faces would have been absent and the safety of the entire cast and crew would be in danger. I'm not saying it would have been a better choice, but it would have made a better movie. It was still really funny at points, but the truth is we'll only remember Cohen's crazy promotional hijinks rather than the film itself.

Review of "Bernie"

Oh death. My favorite subject in all of the world. Whether it's a philosophical argument, an art installation or a film, I'm down, balls to the wall. Jack Black's new, and surprisingly serious role as the village-loved mortician, Bernie, is an impressive feat for the comedian. Not only does the film tackle a solemn and contentious story of murder and friendship, but it also straddles the line between fictional storytelling and documentary filmmaking. I've never seen dramatic reenactments quite like this.

Bernie follows the story of a fluffy and lovable mortician in a little village in East Texas. The man seems a saint: leading the church choir and bringing gifts to the local widowers all while attending to his passion, the care and preparing of bodies for funeral services. Bernie becomes quite the elderly ladies' man, until he encounters an obstacle: the very wealthy and recently widowed Marjorie Nugent (Shirley MacLaine). Marjorie is a very unpleasant woman who only recognizes the misery in life. Somehow Bernie shows her the brighter side of life and the two embark on leisurely vacations around the world. Eventually, the keen friendship turns into a possessive pet and master relationship, with Marjorie holding the leash. As nature has it, the beloved mongrel turns on his mistress, and Bernie murders his former friend. The rest of the film depicts how Bernie attempts to cover up the murder as well as his eventual arrest and trial.

Bernie
Starring: Jack Black, Shirley MacLaine, Matthew McConaughey
Directed by Richard Linklater
My Opinion: Worth the watch, but the experience
will differ for everyone.

The comedy in Bernie is specifically tongue in cheek. The laughter seems like it should come from the loud and stylized characters so excellently executed by Shirley MacLaine and Jack Black, however their pairing as a couple is tragic. One cannot dismiss that this story is true and the events, emotions and people are grim instead of comedic. Matthew McConaughey's portrayal of the local district attorney, Danny Buck Davidson, provides some relief, however, the tale hits the heart instead of the gut.

Of course since the story is based on a true event, I'm sure some details were exaggerated and others omitted (although the Wikipedia page begs to differ, claiming the film depicts the story "pretty much how it happened.") I know some critics took issue with the lack of comedy in the film, but I think that the few scattered and subtle laughs were appropriate for the content. I'm not sure how comfortable I'd feel if I were made to laugh hysterically at such a serious matter. I also don't feel that the reportorial style of the film takes away from the entertainment value, but rather provides a tone of realism. Bernie takes us into the depths of the hurricane of swirling human emotion that is involved in a crime of passion story. It's a psychological portrait of desperate people and the actual village that knew them.

Review of "The Woman in Black"

For Daniel Radcliffe, his role as a lawyer and father of a 4 year old boy is a landmark role. Aside from some respectable onstage roles, Radcliffe has been known only as Harry. Although entertaining and creepy when narrowly escaping cliché, The Woman in Black watches more like proof of Radcliffe's eagerness to shred those trendy round frames for more cinematic endeavors.

The Woman in Black
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Janet McTeer
Directed by James Watkins
My Opinion: Eh.

The film follows Arthur Kipps as he travels to a remote village of Cryphin Gifford in order to examine the documentation of an old mansion haunted by the spirit of its late owner. Personally, I really love possessed children crushing their doll's faces as they walk to a window to jump to their deaths, but this isn't exactly an original opening for a film. In general, the director relies far too heavily on cut-aways of decaying toys and expressionless dolls. Watching The Woman in Black is kind of like going through a haunted house with a predictable yet satisfying ending. I honestly don't have much to say because, what with its generic, scrambled storyline and cookie-cutter Victorian era-dialogue, the film itself doesn't leave much of an impression.

I will say that I am happy with the way it ended. I was excitedly clawing at my seat for at least the final five minutes of the film. Yet it was too little and way too late. With the final moments as the anxiety-inducing climax, the film as a whole is slightly above mediocre, but I don't regret having watched it. I do hope that Radcliffe's next role is more challenging and invigorating than this easy go-to film.

Review of "Ted"

In The Little Princess, a father explains to his daughter that when she's not looking, all her toys come to life, only to return to their inanimate selves when she tries to look at them. Of course, Pixar's Toy Story films told the same fantasy with charming characters and a witty script. Now that we've all grown up, we have a new film to satisfy our dreams: Seth MacFarlane's tale of a little boy who wishes his teddy bear to life.

Ted
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, Seth MacFarlane
Directed by Seth MacFarlane
My Opinion: Take it lightly, but it's a trip.

Just like the original Toy Story fans, that little boy and his toy have grown up, and the romance of bear-come-to-life has outlived its sweetness. Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) has become a foul mouthed, jobless stoner who depends on his best friend, John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg). The problem is John has a serious, and seriously hot, girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) who wants John to grow up. But as long as John has his teddy bear, he'll always be a little boy. So, Ted has to move on with his life. That means getting a job and an apartment of his own - that's when the fun starts.

Ted is exactly what you want it to be. It's a pretty stupid movie, but it's hilarious from the beginning. While it does turn surprisingly serious towards the end, it's necessary for the movement of the plot. For best results, Ted is best taken with a lot of alcohol, a little weed, and a lot of people who are in the mood for stupid laughter. Don't get it from RedBox with your boyfriend for a romantic Thursday night because you'll just think it's fucking stupid. This movie needs some social vigor to go down smoothly.